Tuesday, October 27, 2015
Tuesday, October 20, 2015
Knocking boots in a small town
It is an interesting correlation between the population size of an area and the activity of individuals who engage in alternative lifestyles. Perhaps it is the sense of anonymity in more urban areas. However, that is the fundamental issue of why some people choose to live the lives they do and where they choose to live. In a small area where there the potential for shaming because of behavior, the conforming to local norms actually leads to greater anonymity; people don't actually know you and all your desires.
In contrast, when you engage in certain behaviors in a region with many people, they may not know your name and, perhaps, they will never again see you, but they will know something about you that few other people do. In the best of all worlds, an adult will be able to live in a community where he or she is allowed to explore and play as an adult, but is not ostracized or marginalized for their actions.
Case in point, in a small town, such as in Fort Bragg, California, if an adult engages in an extramarital sexual relationship, it is considered an affair or “cheating.” If both parties of the marriage consent to the relationship or both have their own extramarital relationships, the gossip will run like wildfire before the wind. Even though there are about 7,200 residents in the town, it is still too small for any truly outlandish behavior. ,br. People will know and they'll talk. Which is odd, if you think about it. If people are do interested in other people's sexual business, why don't they just admit they want to have frivolous, friendly sex, too?
In contrast, in Santa Rosa, California, a city with a population of 171,000 or so, it is quite simple to find clubs or groups dedicated to alternate lifestyles. The two towns are separated by about a three-hour drive, due mostly to geography rather than actual distance, and yet they are so very dissimilar in their community's approaches to interpersonal relationships. The two might as well be on different planets.
Down the road in San Francisco, it is a veritable playground for those who seek alternative fun. Granted, the city is host to millions of people, but it is one of the icons of debauchery in the Western world. “Free love” did not end in the 1960s and the reality of HIV in the 1980s only made people take more precautions, not be more moralist.
Compared to San Francisco, Fort Bragg is Puritanical. Indeed, for a notoriously liberal county, Mendocino County seems like a shriveled prune of virtue.
Why?
Why does a county that at one time was a haven of communes, complete with nude sunbathing, now fly high the flag of convention and conformity? With all the places that are free from judging eyes, why there are not groups organized for hiking the woods and intimate play in the sun? Why are there not fall pygmy forest rutting socials? At the very least, visiting friends deserve a friendly oral release while taking in the breathtaking views along the coast.
Now, if two people choose to engage in a monogamous relationship, that is their choice. That should not be considered, however, the societal default, nor should it be particularly encouraged if both partners are not mutually interested in exclusivity, especially in small towns. The very nature of rural areas allows for greater opportunities to play outside away from disapproving and judgmental eyes.
Granted, if you want to put on a show for people to watch, go for it. I wholeheartedly encourage exhibitionism. Grab some friends and go for a roll in the hay.
In contrast, when you engage in certain behaviors in a region with many people, they may not know your name and, perhaps, they will never again see you, but they will know something about you that few other people do. In the best of all worlds, an adult will be able to live in a community where he or she is allowed to explore and play as an adult, but is not ostracized or marginalized for their actions.
Case in point, in a small town, such as in Fort Bragg, California, if an adult engages in an extramarital sexual relationship, it is considered an affair or “cheating.” If both parties of the marriage consent to the relationship or both have their own extramarital relationships, the gossip will run like wildfire before the wind. Even though there are about 7,200 residents in the town, it is still too small for any truly outlandish behavior. ,br. People will know and they'll talk. Which is odd, if you think about it. If people are do interested in other people's sexual business, why don't they just admit they want to have frivolous, friendly sex, too?
In contrast, in Santa Rosa, California, a city with a population of 171,000 or so, it is quite simple to find clubs or groups dedicated to alternate lifestyles. The two towns are separated by about a three-hour drive, due mostly to geography rather than actual distance, and yet they are so very dissimilar in their community's approaches to interpersonal relationships. The two might as well be on different planets.
Down the road in San Francisco, it is a veritable playground for those who seek alternative fun. Granted, the city is host to millions of people, but it is one of the icons of debauchery in the Western world. “Free love” did not end in the 1960s and the reality of HIV in the 1980s only made people take more precautions, not be more moralist.
Compared to San Francisco, Fort Bragg is Puritanical. Indeed, for a notoriously liberal county, Mendocino County seems like a shriveled prune of virtue.
Why?
Why does a county that at one time was a haven of communes, complete with nude sunbathing, now fly high the flag of convention and conformity? With all the places that are free from judging eyes, why there are not groups organized for hiking the woods and intimate play in the sun? Why are there not fall pygmy forest rutting socials? At the very least, visiting friends deserve a friendly oral release while taking in the breathtaking views along the coast.
Now, if two people choose to engage in a monogamous relationship, that is their choice. That should not be considered, however, the societal default, nor should it be particularly encouraged if both partners are not mutually interested in exclusivity, especially in small towns. The very nature of rural areas allows for greater opportunities to play outside away from disapproving and judgmental eyes.
Granted, if you want to put on a show for people to watch, go for it. I wholeheartedly encourage exhibitionism. Grab some friends and go for a roll in the hay.
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